Clinging Tight? Maybe That's Why You Are Unhappy

Marge came through the doorway of my office with her arms wrapped tightly around her as if she was clinging to someone.

She sat in the visitor's chair never releasing her grip on herself. She seemed uptight, I thought, as though she can't let go of something or someone. I didn't realize how close I had guessed at the truth.

"How can I help, Marge?" I asked.

She said, "I am just not happy. I can't get past something to find happiness. I've tried meditation as you have instructed. I have given it patience and regularity. I seemed to be no farther ahead than when I first began. My mind is still muddled when I try to meditate. I am looking for answers."

Well, that was a bit of baggage, wasn't it?

She still never let go of her grasp of herself.

"Marge, did you realize that you are gripping yourself tightly with your arms?" I asked.

"What? Oh, I know. I don't know why I do that."

I took an arrogant guess by saying, "I think I know what you are doing. There is someone or something you can't let go of. That clinging is keeping you from finding happiness."

"I... I don't know...," Marge stammered.

I asked directly, "What are you holding on to?"

Marge looked at me with what might appear to be hate. She held that glare several seconds. Finally, her face began to soften by degrees. Obviously there was a real battle going on inside her.

"I can't forgive my mother for dying. She was just sixty-five. In her last years she seemed not to care about herself anymore and ate and drank to what I believe was an early grave. She was never happy in all my memories of her."

"You haven't let her go, have you, Marge?"

She snapped that look of what might be hate at me again. Once again her face softened only by degrees. Her arms loosened from around her just a little for the time first since she hove into sight.

"She was such a comfort. But I can't find any more comfort from her now that she is passed."

"You can't cling to a ghost, Marge. Give her up," I said.

We sat in silence for a minute or so. During that time, as if in a slow motion movie, Marge released her grip upon herself. Her hands drifted as autumn leafs falling from trees, it seemed, into her lap. Peace came to reside in her face.

I broke the silence by saying, "Now, follow the techniques you have been taught to discover happiness for yourself. I think you will have a better time of it presently."

She rose to depart and shook my hand and gave me a smile that expressed her gratitude, though she was obvious moved to speechlessness.

Here is a short course in finding and maintaining happiness. Develop a life of meditation or prayer. I believe there is only one way to contact the Source of All There Is and that is through a meditative connection with the Source.

Then maintain that linkage through regular use of the meditative arts. Notice, please, I used the plural, "arts." There are many ways to meditate so find one that fits you best. You may even want to experiment to find one that is best for you.

In that connection with the Source, you will find that you are totally and unconditionally accepted. There is your happiness. For there is nothing greater or finer than being completely and fundamentally accepted.

When you have found that happiness that passes understanding, you will have found the meaning of your life, I believe. Your meaning is to be happy.

That happiness, then, is played out in experience in the world. Your life-purpose is to experience. You experience by being in relationship to all you encounter - be that person, animal or thing.

Marge had learned all these techniques and ideas through her time in the community I lead. She was just so tied up in mental ropes because she could not release her mother.

When you cling too tightly to anything or anyone, you will not be as happy as you will without those attachments. Detach yourself. That is, do not cling so tightly that you stifle any other relationship - like with the Source of All There Is.

Start today to detach yourself from your "clinging" and develop a solid and permanent relationship with the Source of All That Is through the meditative arts.

This has been Dr. Bob 4 U, and I invite you to change your life for the better by claiming your Free Instant Access to a Force-Source-Resource. Just Click Here. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of satisfaction.
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