June: A Whole Month of Happiness and Wellbeing

Welcome to June! June is the sixth month of the year and is most likely named after the goddess Juno. As the goddess of marriage, it became popular to marry in June, a trend that continues today, particularly in the northern hemisphere. Relationships and relationship satisfaction therefore will be our first theme this month. What can you do to ensure a happy ongoing relationship with your partner? On the 21st of this month summer solstice takes place in the northern hemisphere. It is the day with the longest daylight and so perhaps is a good time to celebrate International Picnic Day, which is officially on the 18th. I will discuss reasons why planning a picnic can be good for you. Also celebrated this month is World Juggling Day, which you may or may not have heard of. I think this gives us a great opportunity to try new things and I will talk about this further.

Have a happy relationship

If you are married, recall the time spent preparing for your wedding. The effort you went to so that everything went right on the day. Even the simplest of weddings involves planning and an investment of time and energy. Think back and remind yourself of this effort. So if this was the work you put in before you were married, how about the effort you put in now you are married? It's easy to assume that marriages either work (the couple got lucky), or they don't. What follows are some simple ideas to keep you in a happy relationship, whether you are married or not.

Make up quickly. Arguments are inevitable. In fact keeping quiet about an issue will make you more miserable in the long run and could even harm your health. Research conducted in Maryland in the US shows women who kept quiet during an argument were at greater risk of depression, irritable bowel syndrome and even death. It is okay to speak up, but it is also important to listen. Understand where your partner is coming from than work on a solution that is agreeable to the both of you. Make the effort to do it sooner rather than later, so things do not get out of hand.

Related to resolving conflict is forgiveness. Try to forgive transgressions -- you will feel better for it. If something serious has happened in your relationship that you are struggling to forgive, don't shy away from speaking to a counsellor. They can help put things into perspective.

Practise gratitude on a daily basis. Remind yourself of all the good things your partner does. Why are you glad they are in your life? It's easy to focus on what they don't do. This is an opportunity to alter your perception and focus on the great things they bring to your relationship.

Make time for each other. Life can often get in the way of taking time out as a couple. However if you can put the effort in to do things for just the two of you, it will help maintain feelings of love and affection. You may have to schedule it in like an appointment; just make sure you don't cancel on them.

Don't be afraid to hold hands, hug and kiss. This is easily implemented and there's no rule that says only teenagers can do it.

Eat outdoors

There's something lovely about a picnic. Being outdoors, with a selection of foods to munch over. It's probably the most relaxed way of eating. Whether you picnic alone, with your partner, friends or family, it is a great chance to unwind and forget your worries. Not only that but it gives you something to plan and look forward to. Where will you go, what will you cook, who will you invite? Will you play games or just chat or read books? Since it's your picnic, you get to decide the details. If you want a leisurely day, pick up some cheese, grapes and a baguette on the way to your chosen destination. No preparation required. Don't forget the knife though. And since we're not too worried about rules, don't be concerned if it rains. You can always have your picnic indoors or sat in the car.

Learn how to juggle

Is learning how to juggle really the way to happiness and greater wellbeing? It could be. It's a chance to learn a skill and if you wish, take it to greater and greater levels. One day you're throwing a couple of balls in the air, the next you're juggling swords. Except it doesn't work like that. Learning any skill requires dedication and persistence and probably a good dose of optimism to help you keep going. As you embark on your juggling journey you will get great satisfaction from your accomplishments, especially when you successfully overcome obstacles.

So this month, take the opportunity to learn a new skill -- it doesn't have to be juggling, just whatever appeals to you. You can learn a great deal about yourself and discover a level of determination you didn't realise you had.

Remember

Every month there is a reason to be happy.

Copyright Julia Barnard

Julia Barnard is a counsellor and author living in Adelaide, Australia. You can discover more ways to be happy through her book: Promoting Happiness: a workbook to help you appreciate and get the most out of your life.

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July: A Whole Month of Happiness and Wellbeing

July is the seventh month of the year and is named after Julius Caesar. This month there really is a reason to be happy as International Happiness Day is celebrated. As such I will provide you with some simple tips to help you not only celebrate this day, but to be used at any time. We also have International Joke Day this month, so hopefully this will put a smile on your face. In some parts of the world, Christmas in July is celebrated. As such, I will discuss the idea of blending old traditions with new, thereby creating your own, more contented life.

Get happy

I could provide you with hundreds of happiness tips, giving you ideas to celebrate International Happiness Day. In fact, if you understand a few ideas about happiness, you could probably come up with some of your own. For example, the fact that you can choose to be happy, happiness can be learned, happiness is letting go of the past and not making wild predictions about the future. Happiness is making the most of the here and now, is nothing to feel guilty about and there is always enough to go round. What steps would you take to put these ideas into practise? Whilst you are thinking, I will offer you a few tips to get you started.

1 Switch off the television. Spend the time instead doing something that engages you and absorbs your energies.

2 Do something for other people. There's a lot of research that supports the link between helping others and happiness. You don't have to volunteer at a charity helping out strangers (although it would be great if you did). You can just do nice things for your family, friends and work colleagues.

3 Learn something new. Not sure how to spend your time instead of watching television? Then give something new a try. It will give you a new lease on life, help you overcome boredom and get you out of any rut you are in. It can be anything you like.

4 Have a good night's sleep. Try to ensure you always have the energy to enjoy your life. One of the best ways is through sleep.

5 Have a belly laugh. International Joke Day should help you with this.

Knock knock

Who's there?
Archie
Archie Who?
Gesundheit!

I'm not very good at telling jokes, but I do like to hear or read them. If you're after a quick mood boost, seek out a joke. You will be sure to find something that amuses you. Reading jokes may seem a frivolous thing to do, but is a great way of relieving stress. It's an easy way to bring on some laughs and allow you to recognise that life doesn't have to be all serious. Laughter helps you relax, boosts the immune system, eases pain and is a great way to bring people together.

Since this month in International Joke Day, use this as an opportunity to share your favourite jokes with others. And if you're like me and are not good at telling of jokes, you can always add your favourite to facebook for your friends to read.

Flexible traditions

When I first moved to Australia, come June or July, it always felt like Christmas to me. The time of year evoked strong memories for me, helped mostly by cold winter days. It was early on that I learned about Christmas in July and assumed the celebration was an Australian tradition for those people who had formerly lived in the northern hemisphere. A chance to indulge their senses -- eating mince pies and sipping mulled wine, whilst it was cold outside. Turns out I was wrong. Research has shown that it has a long history and it did not start in Australia.

However, it didn't matter to me. Early on I did celebrate my own Christmas in July. Past traditions were difficult to shake and perhaps I didn't have to. It connected me to my past. However, as the years have passed Christmas in December has been an opportunity for me to create new traditions, which are fitting to my home here. Because it is okay to create new traditions that you can honour year after year. Things change, and holding on to the past may no longer work for you, even if it is all you have known.

Remember, traditions are created by people -- whether at a family or societal level. There's something nice about combining old traditions with new. It keeps you connected in a small way to your past, but allows you to be at ease with your present.

Tip

This year, introduce a new tradition into your house. Make a pledge to do it every year and soon it will be part of your life and something you look forward to.

Remember

Every month there is a reason to be happy.

Copyright Julia Barnard

Julia Barnard is an author and qualified counsellor living in Adelaide, Australia. You can discover more ways to be happy and healthy by reading her free ebook: 50 Ways to Increase Your Happiness

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