Three Keys to Inner Peace

There are so many ways to improve your outlook on life that it is virtually impossible for me to list them all here for you, but in general, there are a few simple tips I can give you that have made my own personal enjoyment of life increase exponentially. They are not complicated and do not involve any rocket science or algebra equations to figure out. It just involves you to honestly look at your self and the situations that affect how you feel and making the choice to let events enhance your life not harm it. These are three simple things I have implemented in my own life that have made it a much more enjoyable experience and you will too. I almost guarantee it. The steps are acceptance, forgiveness and peace, and you are on your way to happiness. If you want to be.

The first thing you have to be able to experience is acceptance. This was a difficult one for me personally because I always believed that by saying I accept a situation, that I simultaneously admit the situation will never change and I am doing nothing of the kind. Acceptance does not mean approval, consent, permission, authorization, sanction, concurrence, agreement, compliance, sympathy, endorsement, confirmation, support, ratification, assistance or even liking whatever it is you are accepting it is simply saying, "it is what it is, and what is, is what is. Popeye believed the same thing, "I am what I am." and so does Patriot Coach Bill Billichick when he analyzes a game, "It is what it is." Until you choose to accept things as they are, realizing and identifying the situation accurately, you will never be able to develop a plan to overcome an obstacle, learn what you need to learn and grow from the experience. Acceptance is the first step, and the most important, because if you never start a journey you will never get to the ultimate destination.

Step two in this search for self discovery is forgiveness. Forgiving someone for doing something that hurt you or someone you care about can be very difficult to do, because we all internalize things that happen to us and take them personally, but to quote an ancient Chinese Proverb, "Anger is a hot rock that burns the one who holds it." To me this means that the heat of anger, disappointment, jealousy, whatever negative emotion you associate with the actions of somebody else, you have to forgive, and let go in order to move on with your life. I also have learned that you don't have to make your forgiveness known to anyone other than yourself. You don't have to have a ceremony, a rite of passage or even talk to anybody. All you have to do is forgive whomever you have to in your heart and you will find you are on your way to finding peace. If you don't believe me, try it. Just think about a person who you feel has done anything, big or small to hurt you, then accept whatever the situation is, and then forgive them for whatever they did or you perceived them to do, truthfully and whole heatedly and if you are sincere you will start to feel relief almost immediately. You can let all of the foolishness of life, and the anger that you are carrying around because of the actions of others, and experience a growth that is outstanding. You can even forgive yourself, and probably that is one of the first places you should start. Whatever shortcomings you have had, mistakes that you have made, dreams you left unfulfilled, goals you haven't reached yet, whatever is pissing you off about yourself, forgive you for being human and accept what has happened. You will find the road that leads you where you want to go will appear to you almost magically. Forgiveness is simple, but it is never easy, because we as people tend to hang on to things and internalize them and they become a part of who we are. Then when you go to forgive them and let them go you fight against it, because these situations have become a part of our identity, they have become who we are, rather than something that happened to us or something we did. Forgiving everyone is what I advocate and moving on into a better place.

Thirdly, if you follow these two things you will find the third almost without any work, it will come naturally to you like an inevitable turn in the river you are riding on, you will encounter peace. With peace will come freedom from the thoughts that you have been carrying around with you. It is as simple as thinking: I accept that experience, I forgive that experience, I am free. This is where positive thinking will start to emerge in your life. It was explained to me that just thinking positive thoughts at the exclusion of bad thoughts is difficult to do, because you have been having those negative thoughts all your life, whatever they are, My parents didn't pay enough attention to me, I am poor, I am always treated poorly in relationships, I am poor because that's all I deserve, when you accept your thoughts as what they are and forgive them, these negative thoughts are not ignored but rather transformed into thoughts of a positive nature. You will find that when this happens you will be happy most of the time. Peace is just another word for experiencing an inner happiness about who you are, where you have been and where you are going.

So give this process a try, accept a situation that has hurt you and all the people involved. Forgive them, all people do crappy things because they are people and its not personal, they are just trying to live their life and you will find a feeling of peace and understanding. Accept yourself and others for who they are and move.

Jonathan Hilton is an author and self discoverer. You can always read interesting things at http://www.jonathanhilton.com/. There are articles and interesting videos and thoughts that you will find thought provoking and stimulating.

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