Remain Happy and Joyful During and After the Holidays

Childhood holiday memories are among our most common life experiences. I remember, growing up in a village on the slopes of Kilimanjaro, the holidays seemed to take forever to arrive. That is the experience of every child: a year is like eternity. For us too, the holiday period was simply Christmas-New Year.

What I remember most about the holidays was the anguish I caused my mother when she took me to the market to buy new clothes. There was an open market in the village twice a week and as the holidays approached, merchants and vendors from far and near filled the market with every kind of merchandize.

My mother would tell me ahead of time the choices I had: I could have a pair of shoes and a shirt, or a pair of shorts and shoes, or a pair of socks and a shirt. The choices always seemed to be incomplete. Going through the display of goods there was so much that I wanted but my mother would say, no; either this or that, not both.

I would then cry in the market which in turn caused her embarrassment and even anguish. What I did not know until I grew up was that my mother simply did not have enough money to buy me everything I wanted. There was no way she could have satisfied my desires.

So, how could she have found joy and happiness in the holidays given that she had six of us?

Even in that remote village on the slopes of Kilimanjaro, holiday demands today have extended far beyond a pair of shoes, pants and shirts. The list today includes iPads and iPhones... some electronic devices that are very alien to me but household names with sixth graders! The anguish my mother experienced that many years ago is many times more today.

One of - if not the - main feature of the holidays is giving; typically giving presents. With giving, inevitably, there is receiving. My mother was giving all the time and we, kids, were on the receiving side.

For Christians and the spiritual, giving is a response, not a cause. We give because we have received. If we get it right, this can be the main source of joy and happiness. Giving to those who have given us or will give us quite often will be unfulfilling. For the Christian giving is in response to the gift of Christ already received. Similarly for spirituality: The realization and appreciation of the gifts of the Universe prompt us to joyously give in response.

There is a second aspect to giving, and that is sharing. There is joy in sharing what we have received, be it material or spiritual. This means that everybody has something they can give or share and find joy and happiness in doing so.

Remember these four points:

1. Give your heart first and if that is all it will suffice.

2. Give because you have received. Count your blessings first and give out of those blessings.

3. Give what you have because you cannot give what you don't have.

4. Giving and obligation are not the same. It is a spiritual exercise not a law.